On My iPhone
by spida-dwag16
Summary: 'He makes a big mistake when he thought all his friends were idiots. Of course, who wouldn't? No one. Smart as he is, he just might not survive this one...'-These are some of the reasons why the Dexholders abondoned modern-day technology.


**Why, ****hello ****ladies ****and ****gentlemen! ****Nothing ****to ****do? ****Well ****there ****is ****something ****now! ****–****Commercial ****Break- ****We ****are ****back ****with ****~The ****Story ****Directed ****By ****SD~ ****Pleassseee ****review! ****IT****'****S ****AN ****ORDER! ****I ****was ****bored ****so ****I ****just ****came ****up ****with ****this ****idea. ****So ****boreddd~**^~^ **So ****I ****ACCIDENTLY ****stapled ****my ****left ****index ****finger, ****and ****I****'****ll ****allow ****it ****to ****heal ****for ****a ****few ****days. ****Trust ****me, ****it****'****s ****A ****LOT ****worse ****than ****you ****think ****it ****is. ****I ****hurt ****myself ****right ****after ****a ****science ****test. ****I****'****m ****clumsy, ****aren****'****t ****I. ****Anywayyyssss~ I ****won****'****t ****be ****updating ****anything ****this ****weekend. ****Although ****I ****don****'****t ****think ****that ****you ****even ****like ****my ****stories. ****THIS ****IS ****FOR ****READERS ****OUT ****THERE! ****And ****co.**

**Me:****Hello, ****my ****audience. ****Pleasure ****to ****meet ****you ****all! ****Allow ****me ****to ****introduce ****to ****you****… *****drumroll* ****My ****personal ****disclaimer, ****Green!**

**Green: *****walks ****out ****of ****the ****curtains ****and ****glares ****at ****SD* ****SD, ****I ****thought ****you ****said ****Blue wanted to give me something.**

**Me:****She ****did!** ^-^ ***points ****to ****a ****brunette ****girl ****in ****the ****audience, ****holding ****an ****iPhone ****in ****her ****hands, ****ready ****for ****camera ****action* ****I ****told ****ya ****soooo.~ ****;D She's gonna give you a picture.**

**Green: *looks at the audience and begins to walk away***

**Me: Green! Don't go! You're my personal disclaimer, remember?**

**Green: No, I don't.**

**Me: *grabs onto on of Green's legs* I'll break it.**

**Green: Go ahead, I don't mind. *continues walking backstage***

**Me: Not your legs, you dolt!**

**Green: …**

**Me: …**

**Green: …**

**Me: … -_- …**

_**30 minutes later…~**_

**Green: You don't mean…!**

**Me: Yup. Just that.**

**Green: You promised you'd never tell!**

**Me: *ignores Green* I'm gonna tell her right now.**

**Green: No! *gets a chair from the audience and smashes it against the back of SD's head***

**Green: ****SD ****DOES ****NOT ****OWN ****POKEMON ****OR ****ANY ****OTHER ****FORM ****OF****… *****SD ****tries ****getting ****up***** …****POKEmon****… *****SD ****successfully ****gets ****up, ****glares, ****stares, ****and ****smiles ****at ****Green***

**Me: *gets her million ton watch and throws it at Green, missing by 3 millimeters* (I wonder how SD (me) can throw that heavy thing. **O_o**)**

**Me: Get away!**

**Green: Fine, I don't even know how this stupid story starts, anyway.**

**Me: *evil laughter* Oh, this "stupid" story starts with an iPhone I think you're _very_ familiar with it.**

**Green: …**

**Blue: Green, dear! *Blue waves at Green with her iPhone in her hand* I'm gonna take a cute picture of you and me!**

**Green: N-No! Get that darn thing away from me!**

**Me: *picks up the heaviest suitcase in the world* HAHAHA! *throws it at Green but completely misses***

**Green: You MONSTER! *Blue nears Green* No! *snatches away Blue's iPhone and runs out the door***

**Me: Oh, well. The story already started, people! Get going and review, review, review!**

**Blue: This was all part of SD's story. Or plan.**

**Me: B-Blue! W-What would make you say that? *gives off doubtful laughter***

**Blue: I want my iPhone back right after the story.**

**Me: …**

**Blue: GOT IT?**

**Me: Y-Yes…?**

**Blue: Great! Let's get the story going on!**

**Me: H-Hey!**

**Blue: Shut. Up.**

**Me: ...** T^T**... I thought you were so nice you wouldn't tell everyone my plan!**

**Blue: Yeah, well, it probably has some hints of Oldrival. I like Green, but not so inappropriate. I may be sexy, but I'm just too hot.**

**Me: …**

**Blue: By the end of this story, I'm going to own you and all your stories.**

**Me: No! Bawawawwww…**

* * *

><p><strong>Normal POV:<strong>

And so you know, a certain boy came out of 'The Stagey Theater ~Directed By SD~,' holding an iPhone. That boy was Green.

"…" Green took a glance at the stolen iPhone. He started to read, "…This cute thing…is owned by…Blue…" He narrowed his eyes.

"They're idiots." Then suddenly, as if on cue, the phone beeped.

"Hello! Are you sick of all your idiots friends?" Green, not noticing, answered.

"Yeah, I have tons of them."

"Then you're just in time!"

"What?" It was surprising that Green _still_ doesn't even notice a thing.

"Take the idiot test! It's for FREE! Buy it right now on this very phone and test all your friends!" Green yawned, and kept on walking towards the park.

"Nah."

"Yes! Even you're friends who are _NOT_ idiots!" He turned his head to notice something he should've a while ago.

"What the heck is-" Yes, you guessed it right. Green finally noticed! Yay!~ *throws graffiti and all those other good stuff*

"Huh?" He realized that it was just Blue's phone talking.

"I've been talking to a phone the whole time?" He shook his head and was putting it away. What made him halt, was that he remembered a flashback a while ago.

**Flashback:**

"_Hello! __Are __you __sick __of __all __your __idiot __friends? __Then __you__'__re __just __in __time! __Take __the __idiot __test! __It__'__s __for __FREE! __Buy __it __right __now __on __this __very __phone __and __test __all __your __friends! __Yes! __Even __your __friends __who __are __NOT __idiots!__"_

**Back****to****the****Present-Future!~:**

Green knew that this was a one-time offer. Well, that was what _he_ had thought. Or is it as valuable as he thought it was? He couldn't stop himself…But he heard people calling for him…_**two**_ people. _Female_ voices. Could it really be the girls who he thought it was?

Even if it wasn't, Green wasn't going to take a chance. He hid in the bushes, far away from the two girls, but close enough to hear them.

"Blue, are you _sure_ Green went this way?" A brownish-blackish hair (ponytail) girl with pink, cool glasses turned to look at another girl. (Ohh~, I'm calling my glasses cool! No seriously, it is. Or at least I think so?)

"Yes, I'm _sure_!" The girl Blue sat down and sighed.

"Great! Once I find him, I'll be glad to beat him up like crap!" The girl laughed evilly.

"…"

_~Dun-dun-dunnnn~_

Oh boy.

Green, who was obviously thinking that this girl was- (Not going to finish it! XD)

…

And he ran away.

"What was that?"

"SD, it was just a caterpie."

"Really? I thought it was Pearl." SD looked around.

"Oh look, a ratatta! See, Blue, it wasn't a caterpie! You owe me one buck." She smirked and held out her hand. Unfortunately, Blue was already going on the case.

…

Green was lucky to get away from the girl who would soon cause destruction. 'Now…how do I start this thing?' He twirled the phone in his hands and found 'Download.' So he downloaded it.

When the app was downloaded, he pressed the app and started off with some fun. I bet you want to know the quiz.

**The Idiot Quixzxxx~**

A button showed on the screen of the phone.

_Press the button if you want to continue._

Green pressed it. Couldn't blame him. He was a person with a lot of idiot friends. Based on MY opinion, if you would excuse me.

_Press this button if you still want to continue._

Again, he pressed it.

_PRESS THIS BUTTON._

You know what, I'm guessing you'll all know what will happen next so…

**45 minutes later…~:**

Green huffed and puffed. But he could NOT give up now. He looked at the screen of the phone.

_Press the button one more time, if you'll please._

"…" As you know, poor Green was tired from all this nonsense. But he pressed it anyway. Poor Green.

_Please __bring __**ALL **__of __your __friends __here._

What the heck was wrong with this thing? But Green followed the instructions. Not so Green-like was he, today?

…

"What are we supposed to be here for? Dia and I are going to practice our manzai this afternoon." Oh! You noticed! Yes, it was Pearl.

"Aye." And that was Diamond! (Dia, if you prefer.)

"And I have some research to do for my dad!" Sapphire turned to Green menacingly.

"I got my clothes dirty because of coming here!" Ruby flared up.

"Would you please STOP complaining about yer clothes?"

"But I don't want to be a cave man like YOU!"

**About an Hour Later…:**

_Yay! You gathered all your friends!_

"Is this thing my phone?" Blue shot a glare at Green.

_And now…on ~Miss Blue's iPhone…~_

"Green…"

"Ehe..?"

_The idiot Quixzxxx begins!_

"What kind of app is this?"

"I found it."

"So you stole it."

"No."

"Not the app, the phone! It's mine, isn't it?"

"What. Do. You. Think."

"… Yes..?"

"No."

"That's it, Green, I'm GOING TO KILL YOU!"

_Please enter your password. Then press 'OKAY' or 'CONFIRMED.'_

Blue rushed back to her phone and typed in her password.

_You have. No new messages. Would you like to continue the quiz?_

"Yes!" Green and Blue both answered, with everyone staring at them. Yellow was entering the front door when…

"OHMYGOD!" With that said, as soon as she went in, she went out and slammed the door.

"What?" Blue snarled, but Green stopped moving. Blue looked at the floor, only to find herself on top of Green.

"OHMY-WHAT THE F***IS WRONG WITH YOU?"

_You found first love in a disastrous problem. How lovely.~_

"THIS IS NOT FREAKING LOVELY AT ALL!"

_Dum-dee-dum…~_

Next, Gold entered. You can actually imagine the expression on his face when he came in.

Not.

He screamed. Like a girl. He was perverted, but even a pervert has a time when they are NOT. So he screamed as a sign of a day off, freedom.~

_To solve this problem, why don't you just solve it with a quick 'Get off?'_

Blue got off of Green, and-

'PSDDSHHH'

Green was sent flying off to space. But as soon as he was sent, he was delivered back to Earth.

_That was quick._

"I thought this was a quiz!" Green started yelling at the phone.

_It__**is**__._

"Then why-"

_Because it starts now. 3:00pm._

And they all got sent inside the phone. They got slammed on their asses, and ate cotton candy. Literally.

_Please press this button._

"Ugh, not again!" But when he looked up, there was no button-until he looked around and saw a big button. It was gigantic.

_Get to the button in 60 seconds. 59-58-57-_

Platinum was the only one to land on her feet, and she started running to the button.

_56-You won the first round!_

Platina was holding up a diamond ring.

"I was looking for this."

_She's too smart. Anyways, the second round starts!_

A ferriswheel popped out of thin air.

_Enjoy the ride, have fun, and discover new secrets and why!_

"Alright!" Gold and Black jumped into the seats, only to get electrocuted.

_That was fast. I guess you already found one secret._

"Hmm…" Crystal picked out a metal pin from her pocket and poked the ferriswheel. Nothing happened.

_You found yet another secret. Good job! The ferriswheell's electric things conduct nothing but idiots!_

"Hey!" Gold went on arguing with the iPhone while Black and Crystal strugged.

"He's an idiot alright." Crystal sighed.

_And now the real test begins!_

Everyone looked at the phone like it was crazy, but apparently, it was driving some certain people crazy.

"How much 'real' tests are there! I swear, if you don't answer me I'll-"

_There is one last one. Press the button._

"I'M DONE WITH THESE BUTTONS!" Green threw the phone to the floor, making Blue yelp. "Get us outta here!"

_No can do, sir. You'll have to finish the test.*a smirking face appears on the screen of the phone, then turns back*_

"Did you-Did you just-?"

_Yes, I did indeed! :P_

"Let us take the freaking test!"

_Press the button._

The world around them reverted back to normal, then reverted back to candyland. Sapphire, being short-tempered, pressed the freaking button that had appeared once again on the phone of the screen.

_Somebody __hit __or __smack __the __person __who __pressed __the __button. _(Hit or smack? I don't know.)

White smacked Sapphire. (I guess sommmebodyy chose smack! ;D) This made Sapphy really mad. She fumed, then got ready to hit, but was waiting for instructions form the phone, in case she did something wrong. Smart.

_Pick a flower and eat it._

"Flower? What flower? I don't see a flower. Do you see a flower, Red?" Ruby turned to ask his senior, Red.

"Huh? Oh, uh no." Red turned to look at Green, who apparently had a flower in his hand.

"H-How did you-?" Green cut him off before he could finish his question.

"Find a flower? I made it." Seeing that his friend was still looking at him like a fool, he added, "Out of candy. Cotton candy."

"Oh." Oh? Oh. Sad. So sad.

_Eat it._

Green stuffed it in Ruby's mouth, making gawk and choke and-you know what I mean. Including the part with "-my clothes!" part.

…_This is no fun. What do I do? I might as well send you back to your original place._

The sky swirled, the ground swirled, everything swirled. In a few seconds, they were Blue's home. And they heard something blow up. It was Blue's watch. The explosion was caused by…Green.

"Green!" Shouting was heard from Blue, how it was her favorite watch, how expensive that thing was, and so on, so forth. Green only replied with a "Who told you to buy something so expensive?" and "Ow! What was that for?"

_A-hem. I'm still here, you know._

"STILL?" Blue stormed back to her phone, Green right behind her.

_Um, DUH I am. Anyway, this app was supposed to be BOUGHT._

"What? Hey-" And Green did not finish his sentence.

_This app is ¥100,20l. Pay up. The owner of this iPhone._

"What?" Blue then shot glares at Green and walked menacingly towards him. A shadow was cast over her face. She had a creepy smile on, and her eye was twitching menacingly too.

"Green…" Green gulped as she neared him.

"You…" Green looked for protection.

"Are…" He scrambled for protection.

"So…" Everyone backed away from them.

"…Dead!" Blue released full anger on him, chasing Green down the block, to the mall, past the ice-cream shop, and all those crazy places.

"…" Everyone was dead silent. But Yellow came in through the front door and broke the silence. (Surprised that Yellow was outside the whole time trying to get her wits back? :D)

"Am I intruding someth…" Yellow faltered when she saw the mess in the house, which the others did not until they actually noticed, which was JUST NOW.

"I'm guessing I am." And she went back out, shutting the door gently. Everyone looked at each other and knew what they were thinking.

"Poor Green."

And they all sighed.

…

* * *

><p><strong>Poor Green! XD At least someone showed sympathy. I'm guessing I should make a new chapter.<strong>

**Whew, this was long! Just to warn you, readers out there, that my other chapters for this story is going to me the longest chapters you've ever read. Probably. I'm not betting on it. And about my finger... it's feeling a lot better, so I'll just stick to my usual routine. Schedules help you get organized. Where's SD, you say? In the story? I'm on this computer, and gave up trying to kill Green. Sorry. I'm gonna appear next chapter though! X3**

**This story was supposed to be "On My iPod," but I noticed that it was actually iPhone. My mistake. Review, everyone!~ IT'S AN ORDER!~ Review. Review. Review. Soon the word 'review' would be stuck in your head forever if you don't review. Review. Review. Review…**

**If anybody wants to, they could draw Blue chasing Green down the block. I don't mind. I just want to see how you readers view it. If you can, maybe draw the Candyland inside the iPhone, okiee?**

**That's all for this week. I hope you enjoyed my story! I know, it was random, but I can't stop it! XD Anywayyysss,…~**

**Thanks ****so ****darn ****much. ****Thanks ****a ****bunch ****my ****readers! **(^o^)

**~SD**


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